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Yet as time went on you implied you had deeper feelings which I had now masked in my self. Then when I once again throw my self openly and totally, giving my entire being you tell me that you no longer want me?

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Using my weakness against me and to what gain for your self? You say I was your first which I no longer belive, for what wants tonoght just give away a gift to an individual who they plan on not having in their life? Yes I might have a age as well as mentally being older then even some of my own elders.

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How ever I am emotionally a and will always be due to the vast amount of I endured in my lifetime. While I know that at this age I can chose to change myI see no reason to.

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Not one person has evertold me the truth of how they feel about me. Oh I know I have secrets and habits I developed during my aging process.

For this I am sorry, I do try to break them, but I need them to keep everyone at a distance so that I may exist in this plane with out losing my sanity. I Ridgee you and I have delt with the lack of acceptance, carenuture and love. This is how I protect my self I will never forgive that until in forget you.

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You could have had me if you chose to. You did not So fuck you BiTCh Its because I love you, I imagined that it would be our place to run, that you wanted to have a family with me, I can never get that out of my head. You took the very last piece of my heart left. Its all gone now I seex cold and numb, do you understand!

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I could have kept that little piece left after all these years now I am empty and its my fault for loving you. Which I will all ways do. I love you now please never speak to me as Kentuvky pain will drive me crazy because you will never chose me this I know?

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